Today is the 8th anniversary from the day Ben and I said, “I do.” We’ve had some rough years like when Ben went to grad school the year Peyton turned one. And we’ve had some really great years like the year we built our first home. Our love story has ups and downs. If it didn’t, it wouldn’t be much of a story at all. What’s important is that our story has the happily ever after.
Some know our story, and some don’t. In light of the day, I’ll share it for those who don’t.
When I was 16, I made a list in my girl’s bible class of things I looked for in a husband. The list ranged from things like “must be a Christian and must be a member of the Lord’s church” to “must like cartoons and must be taller than me”. There were 48 points total. I carried that list through boyfriends, relationships, and spontaneous dates seeking out my husband. My friends made fun of me in college for how closely I abided by that list. One guy crossed off every point instead of “must be financially smart” and “must be taller than me”. So we broke up. (No point in dating if you ain’t gonna get married.)
Then, I met Ben. We became best friends who thought each other was attractive, but didn’t want to be the first one to admit that, so we just hung out as best friends. I knew he could be something special, so when we would hang out, I checked my list periodically. After several months, I realized he marked off the last point on my list: must be able to cook. That was it. He was it.
We were driving around Sheffield late that night. I remember it like it was last night. We stopped at a stop light, and I blurted out, “Ben, I’ve got to tell you something.” I reached for my list. It was folded up in about three folds. I handed him the paper and explained how I made the list in high school and further explained how he had crossed off all the points. So he was my perfect guy that I truly believed God had made. For me.
He read it in silence. I bet it took him 15 minutes to read all 48 points; at least it felt that way. After a while, he folded it back up and handed it back to me. He just sat there and stared at the stop light. It had turned green, but our car didn’t move. I said, “Please say something.” I was afraid he was going to hold up the white flag, open the car door, and make me walk home.
Instead, he opened up his middle console to reveal an envelope with a piece of notebook paper. On the notebook paper was 16 things that he looked for in his perfect woman. Things like “must love music, must be God fearing, must like to talk.” He told me that he made a list in high school too, but never told anyone. I’m so glad he chose me to tell. A year later, we were engaged.
It’s been 8 years since we married and I’m more in love with this guy than ever before. Our love story has a long way to go, but as long as God has the pen, we’re prepared for the ride. Always & Forever.
“Therefore what God has joined together, let not man separate.” -Matthew 19:6
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